Living the dream..or merely daydreaming?

When you go to our blog, you will see the title that says, "challenges and misadventures on the road to living the ultimate dream."  I have been thinking about the phrase "living the dream", in our case being living in the US Virgin Islands. I realized now I don't really like that phrase...it sounds..well, dreamy-ish... unrealistic...foolish....

Sure, who doesn't think living in the caribbean  to be living the ultimate dream? (Well, maybe a few of you, but majority will probably agree with me on that one).  The problem is, dreams are unreal. So when I tell people that we are going to live our dream...of course many are skeptical because it is unrealistic. Heck, I was skeptical...and I think sometimes I am still a little bit skeptical even though I have decided to do this with my husband.

I tried to convince myself that we are not those people who just quit their job and buy a one-way ticket to do something utterly crazy and unpredictable like this. Well, okay.. I know we are NOT one of those people (I don't think I can handle the stress and anxiety level of being that spontaneous..). Or at least, we are less crazy and less unpredictable (well, actually I am really not crazy and very predictable, my husband is somewhat the opposite of me). But, who can predict, no matter how much planning we do, of how we will manage once we move there? That's the part that scares me.. a little bit... and makes me skeptical of this whole idea.

So I kept going through this over and over again in my head, reassuring myself that this will work.
We do have a plan, and a timeline. We are working hard to save as much  money as we can, looking into networking online, searching blogs online about people who made it there, gathering paperwork for getting my PA license there, gathering paperwork about getting a business started there, etc, etc, etc (I plan on blogging in more detail about our planning and prepping of moving there as we go). It should work, right? It is possible to live there, heck tons of people did it. But tons more did it and went back to the mainland... for various reasons, including being unrealistic with their goals in life.

Some people probably think we are crazy, foolish, daydreamers. We are not. There is a reason why we want to live there, and it doesn't just involve cheap rum, gorgeous caribbean beaches and Johnny Depp...okay it really doesn't involve Johnny Depp at all. It really is about something more than that. I read online from people who already moved there that their first advice is to think why we want to move. If the answer is to escape from our life in the mainland, that is not a good enough reason. Well, I don't think that is our reason. It's just we are both sick of living in a place where everything that matters don't really matter. People only care about themselves, ignorance is rampant, all that matters here is money, what Kim Kardashian is doing and how to get everything I want right now. My husband said it perfectly: "there is no sense of community here." This is the major reason why we want to move, and why not move where it is also beautiful?

And where is that distinction between living the dream and reaching your ultimate goal in life? I like to call this reaching our goal in life: to live fulfilled, to live the best life we can be, to give something back and be a part of humanity. Is that too dreamy-ish? too unrealistic? Majority of my family will probably say yes. They will say just get a good job, buy a house and have children. But our goal in life is not to just work and have kids (something that a lot of my family members do not understand). Our goal is not just to do what everybody else is doing. We want a purpose and a sense of accomplishment in our life that we did something truly important and worth it for us. After all, shouldn't that be what living is all about?

I'd like to think that we are being realistic... and not merely foolish.

~josie

          He who has a why to live can bear almost any how.
                                      ~Friedrich Nietzsche

          The saddest summary of a life contains three descriptions: could have, might have, 

                 and  should have.
                                      ~Louis E. Boone

Birthday Food Extravaganza 2012

Last, last Sunday (March 4) was my birthday. I turned 29... one more year before the big three-zero.
There was no big celebrations or parties this year. Well, actually there usually is never a big party or celebration for my birthday, not since I was little anyway. I'm over birthday parties.

That didn't mean I didn't celebrate. I thought of how I wanted to celebrate my birthday this year. What better way to celebrate than with yummy goodness in your tummy??? So we made a plan of a weekend trip to fatten ourselves with delicious food. The way to Josie's heart IS through her stomach...

First stop was LA for Indonesian food. We went to Simpang Asia, known for its simple, cafeteria-style food as well as its grocery store full of Indonesian snacks. We had Nasi Mantep (Indonesian rice dish with egg, curried chicken, collard greens, beef. chili sauce wrapped in banana leaves), Rendang (beef curry with coconut milk), Ketoprak (tofu, potatoes, rice cakes, sprouts, thin noodles, chips and spicy peanut sauce).  I wanted to order more, but I had to control myself....

Ketoprak on bottom left, Nasi Mantep on top and beef curry on bottom right.

After eating, we obviously had to buy some Indonesian groceries. Unfortunately since we were going to be out and about all day long, I could not buy some of the homemade Indonesian pastries/cakes since they would probably go bad being left in the car all day.

Next stop: Claremont. We had to work on our appetite for dinner so we went on a hike first with the dogs. Two hours and five miles later, with a trip to Petco and Target as well, we were ready for dinner. Eureka Burger! is the only reason we came back to this town. Originally started in Redlands, California, Eureka Burger has a variety of gourmet burger selection like the Pearl Street Blues burger with melted bleu cheese, herb-sauteed wild mushrooms, grilled onions, chipotle ketchup with added bacon on top on freshly-baked buns. And fries, with spicy ranch dressing. Oh, and they also serve Hangar 24, local beer brewed in Redlands: our FAVORITE beer.

Pearl Street Blues Burger: 

Hangar 24 Orange Wheat

The night came to an end, and so did our food extravaganza day one.

The next day we stayed around in Oxnard at the Marina. Food galore continued with fresh, sweet strawberries from the farmers' market, and Toppers Pizza for lunch.

jalapeno, red pepper and chorizo pizza

big and sweet!

 We finished off our celebration by having seafood dinner (naturally, since we were right by the ocean) at Sea Fresh. Unlike Simpang Asia and Eureka Burger!, we've never been here so this one was quite a gamble. It was pretty good, I was not disappointed with my dinner, but it was definitely not as good as Eureka Burger!

ahi tuna with rice pilaf and vegetables

And that marked the end of our weekend food extravaganza. Well, sort of. I had one more food item I wanted: fruit tart, my favorite dessert. I did sort of demand this one shamelessly. And a good husband Jerrad is, after typically forgetting to buy one for two days, he managed eventually to get one for me.

There it was:

yum.

Perfect way to end my birthday food extravaganza...

~josie

Salty sea dogs and crabs legs

Since the start of the new year I have been sailing (mostly solo) almost non-stop aboard the Pearson Triton we recently purchased. In this short time many adventures have been had and the constant reminder of one's own mortality a reoccurring theme. This tale is from our exploits during our most recent passage to Santa Cruz Island.

As Alex, Josie and I arrived at the docks Friday night, the winds blowing like fuck-all (40kts+). Optimistically(or foolishly), we loaded the boat and with any luck the gale would blow itself out before daybreak. We slept reasonably well given the howling winds and violent whipping of dozens halyards on dozens of masts.

Waking up an hour late the next morning, the outlook had significantly improved. The wind had calmed to a good stiff 25kts and the swell was not unreasonable. Upon realizing the good news, we loaded up on supplies and began preparations to make sail.

In a bit of fortunate misfortune, we decided on a last minute test of the BBQ. The weathered valve was not only faulty but seized in the propane feed tube. This was not a welcome delay, as we had already watched our planned departure time come and go. 

After about an hour of searching we found a second hand boat supplier, that not only had the replacement but also provided us with a workshop. We immediately set to freeing the useless and corroded old valve. This cumbersome process required the use of: a large hammer, an equally over-sized screw driver, an excessive quantity of penetrating fluid, a vice and a substantial application of force. In the end we were triumphant.

Upon returning to the docks the wind had not yet let up, this was good because we were now hours behind schedule and needed to make good time. Hastily, we prepared to make sail and planned a launching strategy. This strategy turned out to be a fantastic failure due to the strong winds and the old boat's terrible steering qualities in reverse. Fortunately, without too much drama and some fancy rope work we got her pointed up into the wind. We were finally on our way.

With the winds blowing 25kts with 30kt gusts we hoisted the sails and began to settle in for the six hour voyage ahead. We were finally making good headway and beginning to relax when Daisy, our German Shepherd, went tumbling-head-over heels off the back of the boat. Taking the helm and assigning my wife as a spotter, we performed a standard man overboard procedure. Riding up beside the dog I was able to grab her and bring her safely back on board. She was soaked to the bone but no worse for wear. I had been planning on putting netting in around the stern pulpit, and by week's end there will be.

Daisy relaxing on a calmer day

Once we were north of Ventura and well off shore the seas settled and the wind was reduced to a comfortable 12-15kts. We were able to shake out the reef and  run under full sail. Between that point and making landfall at Santa Cruz island things were pleasantly uneventful. 

The sun set as we made landfall, which was beautiful but less than desirable, as we were yet to anchor on what would be a near moonless night. With our intended destination still over 12 miles away I hoped we could sneak into Potato Harbor in the last lingering moments of twilight. We would have no such luck, all detail was lost to the darkness before we even arrived at the entrance. 

 

We pushed on through darkness for another hour and a half to Prisoners Harbor.  Its easy approach and unlit military supply dock [marking a safe anchorage] were ideal for just such an occasion. With one eye on the depth finder and the other on the featureless coast, we anchored bow-and-stern. Once satisfied with the hold and angle to the swell we were able to relax for the evening.

Once settled we spent the night fishing for crabs under the innumerable stars that are lost to the city lights back home. Our entertainment was watching the bio-luminescent display known as the red tide. The harbor came to life as dolphins chasing schools of fish lit up the waters around us. This seemingly electric display is impossible to photograph and a description in words is inadequate. One would have to see it themselves for it is a truly magical thing. This went on through the night and after pulling up a good haul of crabs we went below to get some sleep.

We woke in conditions so calm that the angry seas that tried to steal my dog seemed so far away. We would have had the glassy water of the harbor to ourselves that morning, if not for the sea lions and pelicans. It was a lazy day in all the best ways and once we were all up it was time for breakfast.

When I unwrapped the crabs they were still lively as ever. The biggest of the bottom dwelling bastards was none too happy to be in the same bucket with the others; he brutally removed the claws of one and nearly cracking another in half as we were preparing the grill. Making short work of cleaning them, I handed the meaty bits over to Alex to be cooked.

Upon finishing our delicious breakfast, we noticed a large number of fish had found refuge under the Triton's hull. I tried free-diving in the icy cold waters but there was simply not enough visibility. I quickly gave up and resorted to rod and real. Using bread for bait, we fished till our cooler was full and the few pieces of bread we had were gone.

It was now half past four, well after our planned departure time but more importantly well after lunch. We made quick work of the fish and headed for open water. The wind was just strong enough to allow for good speed but not enough to cause any undue discomfort. The sun set as we cleared the point and again we headed into darkness.

A dark night with a good breeze has to be one of my favorite times to be at sea, and I enjoyed this near moonless night maybe more then others. Our boat moving in solitude and silence through calm seas was joined by a pod of dolphins. The electric glow of the red-tide allowed us to see every detail of their movement. You could see them lazily riding the water pushed aside by the hull. They were rolling and playing with one another; so close you could literally reach in and touch them. Once bored, the dolphins would veer off at full speed leaving a glowing comet trail behind, only to return a few moments later for another free ride. It went on like this for some time as we took turns riding the bowsprit. It really is amazing the otherworldly things you can see so close to home if only you know where to look.

Shortly after the dolphins had abandoned us for good we were back in the safe waters of the harbor. Returning to the slip was far simpler a task then leaving it. With nothing lost to the sea or damaged aboard the ship, our voyage was at an end.

~jerrad

the business of medicine in worker's comp: money is always the keyword

I have been working for almost three months now and I am already getting restless, drained and can't wait to leave this system.

I currently work in an orthopedic office specializing mostly in spine orthopedics and worker's compensation claims. How is it, you ask? I would rather go back to the craziness of PA school than work here. That says A LOT about how much I don't like this job.

I'm not generally a picky person, ortho was never my first choice but I took it anyway. Hell, I'm not a picky person at all I took the darn job in Bakersfield!! Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful I have a job during these hard economic times, but working for this system is exhausting.

I never knew how broken and inefficient our worker's compensation system is until I started working here. The idea of it sounds good, but the reality is far from it. Why? well, to start we have to get authorizations for pretty much everything in worker's comp: xrays, MRIs, medications, therapies, lab tests, referrals to other specialties, and of course the expensive procedures.


Countless times I tell my patients, "your insurance company is denying it," or " we haven't heard anything from your insurance yet"; I have seen patients wait for longer than a year to get back surgeries approved, or even a simple, relatively cheap treatment like physical therapy. I have seen real, legitimate patients suffer because they can't get treatment through worker's comp, and they either don't have private insurance or their private insurance won't touch their complaint since it's worker's comp. These patients are stuck; getting by daily with pain, unable to function, unable to live life to the fullest. Imagine living day in and day out in pain, no work and unable to do most of anything. That is a terrible life.

Then I get stacks of denial letters. These denial letters are pages long, typed in small fonts and in such a way that you don't even want to read it. The reason of the denial usually is never straight forward; they list all kinds of guidelines they used, and you have to search for the actual sentences that say the specific reason they deny a request. Sometimes they don't even exist. Sometimes the reason is beyond ridiculous. It's like they purposely try to frustrate you when you open that letter.

But not all the fault lies on the insurance company. The system is broken, because it's also being taken advantage of by the patients. I have also seen patients claiming heart attack, diabetes and hypertension through their worker's comp. I mean, that's stretching it a bit, don't you think? I have seen people lie and fake pain to get painkillers, because lots of times we provide meds in house, not through prescriptions.

Between the denial of treatments, people claiming diabetes caused by their work injury, people lying to get painkillers, delay of treatments and diagnostic testings, and 80 work comp patients a day, I finally read what is between the lines: MONEY. Money talks, money controls what can and can't be done, and money drives the huge volume of worker's comp claims we get. It is sickening, but it is reality.

I went to PA school because I want to do something to help people. I know you think, "that's what every medical professional say, but they really go into it because of the money"; well the money's good but that is not all the reason. I actually do want to help and do something productive to improve people's lives.

I have never felt so frustrated and so useless in my job (well, I've only worked  for 3 months now, but still...). I missed my clinical training days as a student in family medicine, in private practices and urgent care, where at least I still felt like I did something productive and helped my patients. But nowadays, medicine has become more and more controlled by money and medical treatments are getting harder to come by...

                                                    
                         “When morality comes up against profit, it is seldom that profit loses.”
                                                               ― Shirley Chisholm

~ josie

Just a quick update

I've been back from Haiti for about a week and I have been busy writing but don't know when I will be done, I will post as soon as I am finished.

 

-Jerrad

Chocolate Sprinkle Sandwich - A Dutch Legacy

It has been a while since we updated this blog. Jerrad is currently in Haiti, building schools and doing good for the world, while I am here working and getting drained by the non-sense and ridiculously broken worker's compensation system. Jerrad has all the exciting stories, but he has crappy internet there so the responsibility of updating our blog has fallen into my shoulders...


Thus comes the story of .... chocolate sprinkle sandwich. I know you feel sorry for me now, since I have such mundane and boring life that all I can write since the last 10 days or so is about some sandwich (that most of you probably think repulsive in some way), but don't!! I'm not, I'm excited about my chocolate sprinkle sandwich.

And I'm about to share it with you.

Chocolate sprinkle sandwich, as you have probably guessed, is made of two pieces of bread with loads of butter on them and topped with chocolate sprinkles. This is a Dutch thing, and the Dutch takes their chocolate sprinkles seriously.

You see, not all sprinkles are created equal. The sprinkles used for this sandwich is known as Dutch chocolade hagelslag, which consists of at least 35% cacao in it. If it's less than that, it ain't no chocolade hagelslag. And yes, these sprinkles taste better than your average joe sprinkles found in the regular supermarket. Here, to find one of these chocolade hagelslag, you usually have to venture to an asian supermarket... (why? I'm not sure..but probably because we Indonesians are also crazy about the chocolate sprinkle sandwich). One famous brand is this one:

Another proof that the Dutch takes their chocolate sprinkle sandwich seriously: just click here.

As far as us Indonesians, why on earth would we be so crazy about these weird sandwiches anyway?
Indonesia was colonized by the Dutch for 350 years, from the 1600s to early 1940s, before the Japanese invaded and ended the Dutch rule. And...the world history lesson ended here, folks.
Chocolate sprinkle sandwich is the Dutch legacy left behind long after the Dutch ended its ruling power. Everybody in Indonesia at some point or another has probably had some chocolate sprinkle sandwich in their lifetime (well, okay, I might exaggerate a bit, but I'm sure the majority of us have). I used to have this for breakfast every morning and for school snacks as well (health enthusiasts, please don't lecture me on the nutritional value of these sandwiches... I had a good childhood, thanks in part to this sandwich).

I made my husband tried it, and he didn't vomit. He responded pretty well actually, and confirmed that these Dutch hagelslag is better than the regular sprinkles. So, I would recommend you to try it as well. I mean, what's not to like? Bread...good. Butter...yumm. Chocolate...HECK YES!!! Look at all that goodness:

photo credit: theeatenpath.com

~ josie

marriage 101: "let your partner grow"

When my husband asked me if it was okay for him to go to Haiti to volunteer for All Hands, my instant and immediate response without thinking was, "No! Of course not!"

Then I thought about it for a few seconds, and I told him.... the same answer (which in my head was more like, "you must be nuts if you think I would be okay with you going and doing something cool on your own and leaving me here in this shithole Bako-town by myself!")

Now let us examine this response carefully.
First of all, All Hands is a non-profit organization with minimal bureaucracy and politics, it creates projects and sends volunteers in needed areas to do real work in the community, to educate that community and help them rebuild their infrastructure. It is an awesome organization, and you can find a link to their facebook page or website through our facebook page. We both wanted to volunteer with them, so .... obviously, he can't do it alone because I want to do it too! * little voice of reason: sounds like you're being a little selfish, josie!*

Also, if he leaves me for 3 weeks, that means I'll be by myself with two dogs in the house. If I have to leave them 8 hours or more a day to work, that means I have to WAKE UP EARLIER to walk them before work. In the wintertime when it's pretty chilli in the morning?!?!?! I don't see myself doing that...

Then my little voice of reason kicked me in the butt big time. Your husband is about to do something super awesome, and you wouldn't let him go because you didn't want to wake up at 6am to walk the dogs?!?!?! What kind of a selfish human being/wife are you?!?!?!?!

Here's life lesson number one on being married: it's not just about you anymore. The same thing with being a pet owner: you have responsibilities to take care of your pets, including.... waking up early to walk them before you leave them inside the house for 8 long hours.

Another thing I read somewhere about life lessons on being married is that you have to support your partner and let your partner grow. Well, I guess this means if my husband wants to go to Haiti by choice to help the locals there and do something good for the humanity, I should be proud of him and support his decision.

So if you are following our blog or facebook, you would've probably guessed what the conclusion of this story is. If you haven't figured it out yet, he's gone. This is day 2 without the husband and there are 20 more days to go. It's not so bad, we ( me and the dogs, that is) mss him but we are proud of him (okay well, I don't know about Daisy and Gidget, but I am).

As far as the dog walking at 6 am, well..... I'm still working on that one.



~josie